the man who lost...chapter 2 page 8

Thursday,February 12,2004
2:30 p.m.
Hometown
Feezy,the name suddenly appeared again in my life.A lady I knew from one wrong number I dialled a few months back.It was sometime in November,2003.A young lovely chic with a smile of an angel.Fair and sweet.She wasn’t single when I knew her back then. We went out several times during fasting season,having breakfasting dinner together.And then after the Eve,we’re kind of lost contacts.But,what more can I say,she came back.She is beautiful, I couldn’t agree more.With the shape like that,she makes me melt.I wasn’t sure how she feels about me but,I like her very much.I did have a crush on her,but then I realized I shouldn’t approached too much,moreover,she was seeing somebody else.Of course,she was.I noticed that, even anyone else,I mean,this is the new millenium,boyfriend and girfriend thing,it is pretty obvious.But I’d always put myself in the state that if their relationship didn’t work out, I’m always there,you know,a shoulder to cry on,make them walk again,or maybe I can put it this way,for replacement.I never snatched,I never grabbed anybody from anybody’s hand.I just go with the flow.It’s because everytime I had a crush on somebody,she belongs to someone else or at least she was seeing ‘em.It’s not that I’m desperate to have one,but I kind of feeling lonely once in a while.I love talking and chatting with someone,and hang out.I work ten hours a day and I need to entertain myself.Alcohol can’t really do much for me.Jack Daniel’s,Johnny Black,Red Wine,Tequila,name it.I still need somebody that I can talk to,even share anything with.But to be frank,I’ve been in a situation where there are times that I don’t really believe in love,I mean, having love relationship with someone.There were times after my separation,I don’t even believe in marriage anymore.I stopped thinking about love,stopped thinking about having somebody beside me,whereas,that were the moments I love to be alone and I did.But that doesn’t last.After a few months,I realized I need someone,or maybe more.The first girl I met that time was a young student,Es Aff.A nice conservative girl in her first year of Business Studies.She was quite naived with love relationship as she never was in one.I was her first love, but as usual,after couple of months,I screwed her up.That was actually because Belinda asked me to when she found out about it.They got really mad about it,I mean,Es Aff,of course it’s because I dumped her and Belinda because she said I lied to her.I lied to her?I didn’t quite understand what she meant but I didn’t exaggerate that time.And besides that,I think that was the start for a new relationship because a few days later I met another girl,a bootylicious,Shee.It was Sunday afternoon when I met her while she was waiting for her friend near a phone booth just beside a bus stop in the middle of downtown.She was wearing tight stonewashed denim with V-neck bodysuit.She was hot.I was driving my Honda Accord when I passed her by.When I saw her standing there,I made a U-wie and drove back to her and then,I gave her my card.After a week I received a call from her.That was the time we started dating.


Friday,November 24,2001
01:30 a.m.
Hometown-The City
“I’m still young,I’m just 18.You’re 10 years older than me.Are you ok with that?”Shee asked me after we had our supper at a cafe called The River Bank.I stared at her then I blinked my eyes and smiled. “Sweetheart,listen to me,my feelings never really care about that.Once I’ve started havin’ feelings for someone,I don’t think ‘bout anything else,whether she’s young or she’s older than me. It doesn’t really matter.What matter most for me is,whether she herself has a crush on me. So,my point is,do you feel the same like I did?”I questioned her back.She muted yet smiling,then she nodded.I smiled.
“Don’t play games with my heart, please.” She said.
I nodded.

to be continued...